I have a love hate relationship with starting over. Hate, because it means that I likely have dropped the ball on something somewhere along the way. Love, well, love is because my brain is wired for fresh beginnings and new projects.
There will be no proclamations of my blogging anymore. I want to do more. Whether I will or not remains to be seen. The good thing is that I have been doing a ton of thinking lately, and this thinking is sharpening my focus on some things.
You know that feeling you get when you lose yourself in a book? That, “I’m going to read this until it is done, regardless of what I am supposed to be doing today,” feeling that envelopes you in peace and quiet, and inside your own head? I want more of that feeling. I want that feeling in my everyday life. I realize there aren’t a lot of people paying people to lose themselves in books, so as we now speak, I must find another way. I think this way could be via writing.
I am a questioner, and I don’t mean in the raise my hand all the time. I doubt, question and challenge everything I do, every day. It can be downright exhausting.
“Is this the town I should be in?”
“Should I change the restaurant menu?”
“Wonder if I should go get a real job.”
And on and on and on.
One big one I have been asking a lot is the ever present “What can I do to simplify my life?” This is broad reaching. From saying no to job opportunities, to deciding if I should open more restaurants, to whether I should move somewhere less city-like, I feel like I am on a simple quest. I want simple, quiet, less non-stop information and more quality. I want a more controlled and planned daily life that at the least has some quiet time. I guess I should start using a calendar….
Jokes aside, I realize the irony in the fact that I am spreading a desire for a “low info” diet on the internets, but it is true. I really need some peace and quiet.
All this is to say, I’m back, and I may actually write some more. Or not.
hugs + high fives