SELF COMPARISON
I’ve been playing music for a long time. Maybe 30 years give or take. Interestingly I don’t think I’ve progressed a ton as a player (guitar,vocals) and it’s always a bother. A “that’s not good enough,” wrapped up with a “you’re not good enough “ bow. It’s because I’ll listen to things I love and think, “you’ll never write anything that good.” Or hear a vocal and think. “Your not going to hit those notes.” Or the like. On and on. Self comparison stealing the joy.
I mean I don’t think some comparison is bad. There’s a bar to what’s considered good and bad in everything. Shooting for that isn’t terrible in broad strokes. It’s when you stop doing things because you can’t be “x” or as good as “y” that this comparison kills your creativity. Your art. Or at the least, something that may one day bring you joy.
I’m notorious for this and the battle in anything is to still put things out. To improve. Just because you don’t think something is it’s best doesn’t mean it can’t provide value. A swath of joy here, a piece of information there. Someone out there is going to glean a snippet and that’s the goal.
I’ve been challenged at work to do this and have struggled. While working on our newsletter and podcast, I’m constantly pushing to be different than what’s out there. The reality is there aren’t a lot of new and original ideas in any line of work or genres. For the most part the science of training for the every man has been set, the applications of it established. I don’t think people want my opinions on things that have already had opinions on them written. The reality. That’s exactly what people want (well some of you anyway).
People want the opinions and explanations from the familiar and from people they trust. Maybe more so now days as distrust in “media” and “what’s on the internet” has grown deep. I know I have made decisions on articles and writing on the internet as just millwork. Words and opinions ground out like prefab kitchen tables, with as little personality and edge. This thing I see and compare myself to as “less than” is something I don’t even find much credence in.
Maybe that’s why I rail against it. Not from the form, but because I feel that a certain thing has become so throwaway that it’s lost it’s teeth. This is probably why I’ve been patiently collecting emails for a newsletter for this blog and haven’t sent out entry one. Because I’ve decided for you that the newsletter of today has lost it’s teeth, I decided this for you while at the same time you told me you wanted it. I’m an idiot.
Self comparison eventually kills everything if you don’t reel it in. Maybe you should have a reminder in place that when you’re comparing yourself to something/someone else to pull back and ask wha you like about that thing you’ve decided is so much better than you. Maybe that can turn into a small healthy motivator instead of a spirit stifler. Maybe you say, that’s done well, for me to consider what I’m doing to be well done I need to achieve “x”.
Oh and I almost forgot. The ones you’re comparing to, do the same. It’s endless. So lighten up. Break through the “this isn’t good enough” and give your best effort. It’s almost always rewarded.
#hugsandhi5s