WHAT DAY IS IT?

I am calendarly challenged. What I mean is despite my best efforts I almost never know what day it is, either in name or number. Wednesday morning I had mentally marked a new episode of my aforementioned favorite podcast, 60 Songs that Explain the 90's. I opened the magical glass super computer and sat down with a cup of coffee. Knowing that the episodes sometimes drop later than I awake, I gazed upon the disaster that is local news for a few moments and then moved on to the Worlde-ing. Content after solving in 4 moves (sick brag!) and fueled with a perfunctory knowledge of the sports world, I opened up Spotify to see who young Rob Harvilla had chosen to feature this week, and....

Nothing.

Maybe this is a Spotify glitch!?!?

I make my way to to the show, page, search episodes and still. There is nothing.

Maybe one of Rob's kid got the poop virus or flu. It is sick season and Ohio is already a cesspool. I hope they are alright!

I sit for a moment and with confidence say to myself, "I know he said they'd be back on October 26th." I then do what comes completely unnaturally to me and look for the calendar app.

It's Wednesday, October 19th.

I give you this long drawn out account not as an outlier, but as my norm. I never know what day it is and despite buying and never using multiple planners AND having a super computer calendar app/appointment machine in my hands as we speak, I am never sure of what day it is until it's upon me. Even then there's usually a 7 day window. Despite this, I'm almost always where I need to be and mostly on time. Just with an added layer of unneeded stress and anxiety.

This trait is so pervasive that even when I take time to plan and use a calendar and project planning tools, I end up stressing out. When ahead, I constantly question if I can, in fact, be ahead and have stress dreams about missing the things I've gotten ahead of. Full on panics thinking I've forgotten something when it's been done for months followed by weeks of checking it over and over and over. Super fun.

//

I imagine this is another symptom of the Shining and I've grown to accept it while still trying to get a little better at it. I haven't missed my anniversary or an important birthday despite awaking in a cold sweat the whole month of August thinking I've missed my mom’s birthday again (once during my college days).

If I show up early or call and say happy birthday 7 days early you'll just need to say thanks and move along.

It really is the best I can do.

#hugsandhi5s